Parenting A Special Needs Child

Do you ever feel you walk alone, handcuffed to an insolvable problem?

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed and hopeless before the challenge of nurturing our wonderful child.

She needs me SO much SO often. Sometimes an awful sensation of stuckness grips me—that I will be forever stuck in this treadmill of solving basic problems that will never  improve, never get better. EVER.

(And of course there are lovely moments as well, but that is not the topic of this blogpost.)

We are fortunate in our world that some people are filled with unlimited positive energy to uplift us and guide us. Such a person is Professor Reuven Feuerstein (pictured above), a cognitive psychologist (that means he studies how we learn and think) who has devoted his life to finding ways to work miracles on unpromising conditions most scientists gave up on ever improving: attachment disorder, fetal alcohol syndrome, autism, down syndrome, brain damage, etc.

He has researched and scientifically proven that our brains can constantly develop—even after being born deficient or after suffering damage. WE ARE NOT AS STUCK AS YOU MIGHT THINK. Our children can develop beyond what we see at the moment.

Below is a concise transcript of the video that follows, in which Professor Feuerstein urges us all: Believe you can overcome! If you do—you will create amazing results!

In practical terms for us, parents of special needs children the message is this: Believe that you can constantly improve your child’s functioning—and you will discover ways to improve it. AND IT WILL IMPROVE.

My daughter was lucky to have a teacher who studied with Professor Feuerstein in Israel. I can attest to the positive effect it had on her learning abilities.

Here is the transcript and the video:

“Belief is generated by a need.

You, the parent, have the need:  if you need to help your child you begin to believe you can change their disability. And if you believe—you begin to achieve.

Human beings are modifiable. Not only their behavior can be modified, but also their neurosystem—marvelously, miraculously!  Actually, the behavior which we IMPOSE upon our brain really SHAPES the hardware of the brain.

Neuroscience today support this view: we can help a person’s brain no matter what their genetic condition or age.  Even severely limited children can be significantly modified. More than we previously believed.

In the past we didn’t believe we could do it—so we didn’t!  But once we believed we could do it and we tried—we achieved very meaningful results.”

You can visit Professor Feuerstein’s website here.

Hey,  all you wonderful parents of special needs children! Give yourself a note of appreciation.

My husband discovered 28 exciting notes of encouragement like this … and sent me them.

IT REALLY TOUCHED ME. I printed them all out and chose one to frame and put next to my desk.

So I want to share them with you parents, who might be thirsty for encouragement, like me.

Sometimes I am strong and I can deal with the frustrations and
disappointments of parenting my demanding  daughter. and
sometimes I feel overwhelmed and I need some reinforcement and
encouragement.

1- See this collection and choose what suits you most: CLICK HERE

2- and download the notes of encouragement and print them out

3- and stick them up all over your house

4- and then tell me which note touched YOU most!

This is a wonderful creation of Terri Mauro. Visit her site.

Enjoy!

Terri Mauro

Read on if you need to recover after a frazzling day with your child who has ADHD or FAS.

So what happened today? Did your child:

• Totally mismanage his time?
• Over-react to some minor stimuli?
• Have some crazy mood-swing and then meltdown?
• Behave hyper-actively all day long?

All this can affect you the parent with your health and stability. No kidding! So what’s a parent to do?’

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF! Now is the time to tune into your own needs and service yourself. Hopefully you are teaching your child to listen to their own body and be aware of the message that their body is giving them regarding safety and behavior. Now it’s your turn to do the same thing and re-charge your own batteries so that you are available afterwards for the long haul.

SO, WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD? Find something physical to give you back your balance. Is it yoga, swimming, jogging, boxing? Find it quickly, and even better if it can be outside.

I’ve been in that experience frequently. Listen to this video clip to find out how I refresh myself and let me know  if this clip revived you. Leave your comment below.

If you like the video below you can see a video of my Number One Calming Technique right here.

Read on if you want to gain something as a parent to a special needs child.

Is there a plus side to being a parent of a special needs child? Is it all about helping someone else with limitations or is there some other personal benefit?

I often experience my parenting as part of a bigger picture of a total healing process.

When I see any of my children hurting and especially my special needs child with her unique challenges, I get an instant physical reminder in some part of my body, of similar upsets and confusions that I experienced as a child. Sometimes I was comforted by somebody kind and got over the upset quickly, but often I remember being misunderstood and silenced and the pain of those experiences is amazingly strongly-felt and still remains with me.

So this time around, I get a chance to stop “time” in place and fix a situation.

When my child is overwhelmed and so unhappy that she can’t function, if I just listen…and hold her….and get her to share, maybe I can really smooth over things and avoid a long- term trauma. Maybe if I am her safe space where she can open up and feel not-judged, I can help her to heal as well as myself.

Watch this clip and leave a comment as to how this affected you.

And if you want to see me demonstrate on video the Number One Technique I use most with my child—click here.

Are you a parent of a special needs child and feeling frazzled and exhausted?

Do you ever have the feeling that you are constantly running from one meltdown to another upset followed by a dramatic tantrum which leads to a frustrated “screamathon”. I do and those kind of days can wear me down leaving me frazzled.

So when something refreshing turns up, I make the most of it. It doesn’t matter how long it lasts…it can be for a minute or a few hours, but I treasure those moments to bring back my sanity and sense of humor.

I recommend not putting those moments off, as life can just turn into one big grind of frustrating, relentless duty.

Enjoy this clip and then leave a comment sharing one of your special moments with me.

To lighten your load, click after on the free video on the right.